Archie Andrews; Betty Cooper; Miss Geraldine Grundy; Jughead Jones; Veronica Lodge; Reggie Mantle; Moose Mason; Mr. Waldo Weatherbee
"Karate Kraze" Archie has taken up karate and is practicing while walking through the halls of Riverdale High. Mr. Weatherbee and Miss Grundy are commenting on how quiet it is when they hear a strange noise, followed by footsteps. Frightened, they hide on top of a nearby light fixture, only to find that it's Archie. Mr. Weatherbee asks what Archie is doing, and Archie says that he's practicing his lessons. At first Mr. Weatherbee just says that he wouldn't want to prevent anyone from studying their lessons, but then wants to know what lessons Archie is studying. Archie explains that it's karate, and Mr. Weatherbee drags him down to his office to explain. Archie explains that recently he and Betty were walking down the street together when a big bully came along and tried to get Betty to dump Archie for him. Archie tells him to knock it off, and the bully punches him after Archie shakes his fist at him. Betty, seeing what happened, clobbers the bully on the head with a book. Reggie, having seen the whole thing, laughs at Archie about him trying to protect Betty. Archie continues to explain that he was now a big joke, and needed confidence, so he took up karate. Mr. Weatherbee allows Archie to continue studying karate, only to pull him back into his office after Archie lets out another yell. Mr. Weatherbee tells Archie to cut out the yelling, then asks why there are boards all over the hall. Archie says he needs the boards to practice breaking them, but Mr. Weatherbee seems a bit annoyed. The next day, Reggie again makes fun of Archie, and Archie says that Reggie should cut it out or he'll use his karate. Reggie challenges Archie to break some boards in the auditorium, and Archie accepts the challenge. Meanwhile, Mr. Weatherbee is backstage checking out the work the drama class has been doing on some stage sets for an upcoming production of Hamlet. Archie, Veronica, Jughead, Reggie and Moose all show up on the stage, and Reggie holds a board for him to break. Reggie is seen thinking that Archie doesn't know he sawed the boards halfway through. After Archie breaks the board in half (or thinks he does - Reggie broke the board in half right as Archie was hitting it), Reggie tells him to try some Karate on Moose. Archie is a bit hesitant to try, but Reggie calls him a chicken and Moose says that it's ok if Archie tries karate on him. Meanwhile, Mr. Weatherbee is still backstage and goes to move a ladder that someone left where it could hurt someone. Just as Archie takes a swing at Moose (and misses him), Mr. Weatherbee accidentally hits Moose in the back with the ladder (from behind the curtain), knocking Moose out. Archie can't figure out how he knocked Moose out without hitting him, and Reggie is surprised at what happened. Confident, Archie walks off as Reggie and Jughead help Moose to his feet. Mr. Weatherbee thinks about telling Archie what really happened, but decides not to in hopes that it will end the "karate nonsense". In the last panel, we see Reggie, Jughead and Moose (later that day) practicing karate chops in the hall as Mr. Weatherbee says "Oh, no!! Not again!".
Li'l Jinx and her pal Greg are walking through town doing typical kid things - "leap-frogging" over a fire hydrant, walking along the top of a fence, etc. As they walk along, Greg asks Li'l Jinx if his dad ever spanks her. She says "You bet he does!", and Greg asks if Li'l Jinx's mom ever spanks her. Li'l Jinx replies "Certainly!". Greg then asks her who hurts the most, and Li'l Jinx replies "Me!"
The Fountain of Goof
On the first page of the story, we get an introduction from a fountain pen, who says that she's a blue blood (she has blue ink). She says that she belonged to Mr. Weatherbee and they've done many miles of writing together. She then says that we can't imagine that she could cause so much trouble for Archie and Mr. Weatherbee, and is seen holding an arrow pointing to the next page that reads "It hapPENed this way...". Mr. Weatherbee is watching baseball practice at Riverdale High and talking to Coach Kleats. Archie asks him to sign a baseball that the rest of the team has already signed. Mr. Weatherbee pulls out his fountain pen to sign it. As he goes to put the pen back in his pocket, he drops it. He is clearly out of shape as he struggles to bend down and pick up the pen. Coach Kleats thinks this is funny. Just as Mr. Weatherbee is going to yell at Kleats, the coach yells that there's a pop fly coming. Mr. Weatherbee, in an attempt to prove that he is not out of shape, goes running for the ball, not realizing that Archie is also running to catch the ball from the opposite direction. The two run right into one another. Kleats says Mr. Weatherbee is indeed out of shape and that he should have had the ball. In an effort to prove which one is in better shape, Mr. Weatherbee and Coach Kleats decide to bet on who can run five laps around the track faster. Mr. Weatherbee asks Archie to hold his coat. As Archie is standing there, Mr. Weatherbee's pen falls out of the coat, and Reggie points this out. Reggie goes to pick up the pen and notices that it's a fountain pen. Archie asks what the gizmo on the side is, and Reggie lifts it up, squirting ink all over Archie, his uniform and Mr. Weatherbee's coat. Archie is annoyed that this happened, but Reggie tells him to just wipe it off. This only makes the spots bigger, and Reggie again teases Archie. Reggie then says he has a friend who can get the stains out quickly - the friend is a chemist. Archie isn't sure what to tell "The Bee" when he gets back, but Reggie says he won't be back for a while, as Mr. Weatherbee and Coach Kleats are seen struggling to run around the track. Reggie says that just in case they get done before he gets back, he has another friend whose jacket looks exactly like that one, and he'll borrow that jacket until the other one is ready. Reggie runs into the school to drop the jacket off with his friend - who turns out to be Jughead in the chemistry lab. After an ad, 2 pages of Archie Club News and another ad [see notes], the story continues. Reggie comes back with his friend's coat, and asks what's going on with Mr. Weatherbee and Coach Kleats. Archie says it's a tie so far, and points to the track, where both are seen lying flat on their stomachs, completely out of breath and worn out from their race. They both agree to finish the race another day, and Mr. Weatherbee asks for his coat, which is suddenly way too big. He asks Archie if he notices anything wrong, and Archie says he doesn't. Mr. Weatherbee heads back to his office, thinking he must have lost a lot of weight running around the track. We then learn that Reggie borrowed the jacket from a friend named "Gorilla" George, who's a member of the wrestling team. Archie tells Reggie to hurry and get Mr. Weatherbee's jacket back. Reggie reveals that he left the jacket with Jughead to clean, and Archie isn't thrilled, saying Jughead tried to clean all the spots off of Veronica's leopard jacket. They rush back to the chem lab to see that Jughead has completely removed the ink. After they leave, Jughead wonders if he should have told them that he dipped the coat in a solution that caused it to shrink. While Mr. Weatherbee is gone, the two switch coats. Later, Mr. Weatherbee puts the coat back on, still thinking that it will be way too big - only to find that it's now too small. He pulls out his pen to make himself a reminder to see his tailor - only to find that the pen is out of ink. Frustrated, Mr. Weatherbee throws the pen out the window, and it hits Archie on the head. Archie, annoyed at all the trouble the pen has caused, throws the pen as hard as he can, and ends up puncturing a car tire with it. Mr. Weatherbee tells Miss Grundy that he's taking the rest of the day off, because he doesn't feel well. He gets out to his car to find that his pen is now stuck in one of the tires, causing it to go flat. At the doctor's office, Mr. Weatherbee explains what happened, and the doctor asks Mr. Weatherbee to tell him what he sees in some ink blots, which upsets Mr. Weatherbee even more.